I don't know about you, but when I wear my favorite fandoms, I feel like a superhero. Invincible! All-powerful! And, above all, I have CONFIDENCE.
If you're on this blog, then you wear a size 14 and up. (I'm a 20 or 22, depending on the day.) Maybe you already have confidence oozing out of your pores. If you do, congratulations! And can you share with the rest of us? If you don't always feel confident, whether it's because of how you look or you're meeting new people or whatever, keep reading. This post is for you!
Sometimes I feel down or I get stuck into patterns of negative thinking. Sometimes I worry too much and, frequently, I even feel depressed. I realized that “following the rules” of fashion wasn't helping. I also discovered that wearing my favorite fandoms — Harry Potter, Wonder Woman, Captain America — made me feel better about myself. I started to think in a more positive manner. When I did that, my confidence went up and I saw the benefits which this can bring.
See, after I had my first child, I had postpartum depression. (It wasn't diagnosed for two years, but that's a whole other blog!) I also couldn't get rid of the “baby weight” that I had gained. I was feeling pretty down, most of the time. I had zero confidence in myself as a mom and just as a woman. I knew yy life could not continue that way. Thankfully, I have an amazing doctor who put me in touch with the right people; I got help.
Once I was feeling better, I realized that I wanted to have fun. Like, every day. And I noticed that my old work clothes just weren't cutting it in my day-to-day life as a mom and a freelance writer.
Lucky for me, geek trends were getting hot. I was able to find more and more fandom t-shirts in stores and online. Although it was hard in the beginning to find clothes that were flattering to my plus size figure, as the years rolled on, it got way easier. I started wearing Captain America shirts and Harry Potter shirts. I noticed that when I wore my fun fandom shirts, not only did I feel more confident and have more fun, I also got compliments!
I think one of the reasons that wearing fandom clothes makes me feel better goes beyond the hero I'm representing. Superheroes usually wear bright, bold colors. And we all know that colors affect our moods. So wearing bright, bold colors is a big boost to my confidence.
For instance, I have a Spider-Man athletic shirt (from the men's section at Sports Authority) that's bright red and black. Red and black are bold colors, right? Wearing bold colors gives me a bold attitude! I'm basically saying to everyone I meet that I have no fear, no worries, and I'm just living my best life. I'm confident! If I have a positive attitude, I have every chance of winning the day.
I remember feeling very nervous when I joined new groups, like my local toddler play group. That was exactly the type of situation which would worry me and I would get stressed out. I would question why I was even going because I was sure I wouldn't meet anyone I liked, and they sure as heck wouldn't like me. This is, of course, an example of my negative attitude.
That's when I would reach for my Captain America shirt in bright red, blue and white. It helped me think positively. (And, in a way, made me feel like I was taking a friend with me.) My plus size Captain America shirt gave me a huge boost of confidence. I went to these new groups feeling more positive than ever. I was just going for it!
Guess what? I actually enjoyed the toddler play group! I even met a woman who is still my friend today, 15 years later. She noticed my Captain America shirt and, it turned out, she was a Marvel fan too. We hit it off and we still talk today.
When I feel down, I now go and treat myself to a new plus size nerd shirt or leggings. If I am going to a social event that I do not really want to go to, I wear the new nerdy clothes to give me an extra confidence boost. I also go with the right attitude, no more worrying, no more fear. I think to myself, I will have fun and if I am not enjoying myself I will just come home early. (That almost never happens!)
My positive attitude helps decrease my worry and increases my confidence. Now, I am generally happy with my life, day in and day out.
Do you feel more confident when you wear your favorite fandom? What's your favorite thing to wear when you need a pick me up? Let me know in the comments! Or, join my private Facebook group for Plus Size Nerds and share your story where lots of women are already sharing theirs.
See also: Download a free style guide with tips and tricks for looking your best and finding the right fit for clothes, bras, swimsuits and more.